why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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