So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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