What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
