Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
