I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
