definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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