Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
