You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
i just made my gag reflex go away.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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