she was so not down for the gang bang
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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