god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
