I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
