i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Dignity is for republicans.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize