I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
