It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
