Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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