I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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