Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
