i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
