My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
