The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
