We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Randomize
