Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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