I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
