Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
