Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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