i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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