You're completely useless in the revolution.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize