Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
