chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Randomize