38 yer olds are good kisserssss
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
