I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
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