I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
