It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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