there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
