He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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