I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
