And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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