I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
