I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
