why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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