Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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