if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
