I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
