I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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