is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
