Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
my vag is so smooth its legendary
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I wish i was in the wii world.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
