They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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