I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
