it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
