I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
The beer is more important than you right now.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
