Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
You need Xanax blowdarts
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
