So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
