if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize